The Freedom in Cancer

Posted on May 17, 2020 by Tony Casson

“Out of my distress I called on the Lord; the Lord answered me and set me free.” Psalm 118:5

It could be relatively easy to allow my lung cancer to imprison me. To let it put me in a box, sort of like the one in that famous mime sketch, where there appears to be no way out.

Learning of the existence of the disease within my body definitely created one of those forks in the road of life where a decision had to be made. A decision bearing major consequences, not one of the daily inconsequential ones we make like, “Which shoes shall I wear?”

The choice here was, “Do I give up to the cancer, or do I give the cancer up to God?”

Do I get in the box, or not?

I have learned that simply having cancer defines a life to a certain degree. It most definitely impacts that life, and the lives of those who are close to the afflicted individual, in a major way. It can even be said that it does confine one in many ways, since there is the treatment that will surely restrict movement and will likely even dictate a lot of what can, and can’t, be done in the weeks and months to come.

But it doesn’t have to become a prison.

I would suspect there are many who might be prone to thinking that cancer has imprisoned them, and looking at it as one whose life has undergone dramatic changes, I can understand the mindset that allows that to happen.

I can understand it.

But I cannot accept it.

What I can accept is that the direction of my steps has changed several times in the last eleven years, and each time that direction changed, it was definitely a radical change. Being like most people, change – particularly radical change with an uncertain or unclear outcome – made me nervous.

“Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.” Proverbs 19:21

So, with the onset of my lung cancer and its initial treatment, the direction of my steps has changed again. Quite drastically, it’s true. Fortunately, because of the changes in the past eleven years guided by a new relationship with the Lord, I am better able to view this nature of the change in a clearer, more positive light.

When it comes to prison, I am – fortunately, or unfortunately (there is an argument for both) – somewhat of a subject matter expert. I also am well-versed on the subject of freedom in prison, so if freedom exists, then the bars do not.

The translation of all of this quite simple, really.

While this cancer has, in fact, created limitations on my life – much like the physical bars and fences around Oakdale FCI, where I was imprisoned – the cancer is totally unable to contain my spirit, because I know the Lord.

And when you know the Lord, “you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:32

So while I am pretty certain I will not enjoy the cancer I have, I know I will enjoy the freedom I will experience in it.

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May 17

Posted on May 17, 2020 by Tony Casson

TODAY IS…

the day God gives us the freedom to forget.

“And their sins and iniquities will I remember no more.”  Hebrews 10:17 KJV

How many of us have felt as if we are being restrained from moving forward? Like there is a ball and chain around our ankle. Some would say that they are carrying around a lot of “baggage”.

Sometimes the promise of tomorrow eludes us because we simply cannot seem to get out of the past.

There are many reasons we may feel this way. Our own guilt is very often a primary cause of inability to get on with our lives. Frequently we will find that we are our own biggest obstacle. Even when we feel that the opinion other people may have of us or something we did in the past is keeping us from making progress in our lives, if we examine it closely, it comes back to us.

Sometimes we simply give those around us incredible power over us.

But let us be realistic about whose opinion is truly important, and who has real power over us. The answer is the same in both instances.

Only God.

The Bible assures us that past sins are forgiven and forgotten. When we ask for forgiveness, what do we get? Forgiveness. And along with that forgiveness comes the freedom to forget, because that is what God does. He forgives and forgets, and allows us to unchain ourselves from our guilt and move on.

Whenever we see another believer who appears to be wrapped up in the past, we must reach out to them and help them remove the blinders from their eyes that keep them from seeing that God has removed the ball and chain from their leg or emptied their excess baggage so now they can set the bags down and move on.

If it is ourselves who are the ones afflicted, we need to read God’s Word for reassurance that with our sincere repentance and our request for forgiveness comes freedom given by God: the freedom to move forward, and the freedom to forget.

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Taken from “TODAY IS….A Gift From God”, (C) 2013 Tony Casson

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May 16

Posted on May 16, 2020 by Tony Casson

TODAY IS…

an awesome day to follow the example set by Jesus.

“I have given you an example to follow. Do as I have done to you.”  John 13:15 NLT

We are all familiar with the lesson taught by Jesus that instructs us to, “Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you.” (Matthew 7:12a NLT).

Many of us learned this, and teach it to our children as to our children as “The Golden Rule”.

Some may consider what Jesus said to His disciples after He washed their feet as simply another way of saying the Golden Rule, but it is far more than that.

Think about our relationship with the Lord compared to our relationship with those around us. We probably treat God with more respect than we do our next door neighbor. We are all very likely to fall all over ourselves to please God, but are only mildly concerned with what those around us think.

Of course, this makes sense since we ask so much more of God, right?

Actually, this is far from right. What Jesus was teaching His followers is that if we are to ask for God’s mercy, then we must show mercy to others. If we are to ask God for His love, then we must take the love He gives us and share it.

How can we ask the Lord to treat us right if we treat others wrong?

Where do we find the nerve to ask God to hold out His arms for us if we are not willing to hold out our arms for others?

How can we ask God to give us eyes with which to see and then not use our sight to notice another person’s tears or pain?

It is a good thing to treat others the way we want them to treat us. This is important, because Jesus said it was. But it is even more telling of our understanding of what Jesus said if we treat those around us the way we want God to treat us.

We must learn for ourselves, and teach our children, that we must never ask the Lord for anything we are not prepared to willingly share with those around us.

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Taken from “TODAY IS….A Gift From God”, (C) 2013 Tony Casson

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May 15

Posted on May 15, 2020 by Tony Casson

TODAY IS…

a great day to remind ourselves to trust God even when we don’t understand.

“His mother said to the servants, ‘Whatever He says to you, do it.’”  John 2:5 NASB

When Jesus’ mother instructed the servants, she had no understanding of how He could solve the problem. She just believed that He could. She gave the problem over to Jesus and then let Him take care of things. She probably was not expecting Him to perform a miracle, and things undoubtedly worked out better than she had anticipated.

This is something that is very difficult for so many of us.

We have the best of intentions when we speak of our faith in God and we give our problems to Him and ask for His help, but we often then sit back and expect Him to do things the way we would do them. It doesn’t always work that way and sometimes we simply cannot understand the approach that the Lord is taking to our problem.

Do we know, better than God, how any situation should be handled? Is it wise to even harbor the notion?

The truth of the matter is that with faithful and diligent reading of the Word of God, we must know in our hearts that whatever God decides is truly what is in our best interests in the long run. It is of the utmost importance that we accept the fact that, far too often, we base our decisions on what we think is best for today.

God is concerned about tomorrow – and the day after that.

If we are truly paying attention to what the Lord tells us in the Bible, we simply cannot harbor the thought that we are not satisfied with the way He is handling a situation we have given over to Him.

There is no safer place for our problems than in the hands of God. There simply is no possibility that we can know, better than the One who created us and gave us life, what is best for us.

We must all give our problems to God, and then trust in Him even when we cannot understand.

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Taken from “TODAY IS….A Gift From God”, (C) 2013 Tony Casson

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May 14

Posted on May 14, 2020 by Tony Casson

TODAY IS…

a superb day to keep our promises.

“But all the leaders said to the whole congregation, ‘We have sworn to them by the Lord, the God of Israel, and now we cannot touch them.’”  Joshua 9:19 NASB

Joshua, and those who had advised him, discovered shortly after making a treaty with the Gibeonites that they had been duped into believing that the Gibeonites were from a distant land. They were seeking to avoid being destroyed by Joshua’s armies in battle, so they engineered a detailed deception.Joshua failed to consult with God before making his decision to enter into a treaty with the people of Gibeon to protect them. He consulted only with his advisors and they were fooled.

To say that Joshua and those who encouraged and advised him to proceed were angry at being tricked is probably an understatement, but they had given an oath to protect the Gibeonites and there was no way out of it.

A promise is a promise.

No promise should be made lightly. If there is doubt that we will be able to keep our promise, then we should not make a promise in the first place. Particularly with our families, it is important that we are as good as our word. This teaches our children to be reliable, responsible, and honorable. Nothing is worse to a child than to have a mother or father promise to be at a recital, sporting event, concert, or some other event that is important to them and not show up. We do not want to be responsible for that level of hurt and disappointment. If we cannot do something or are not positive that we can, we must never make a promise.

The truth may cause sadness, but we at least have taught them to be honest.

It is no different with spouses, other family members, friends, or co-workers. When we promise something, it should be a guarantee. It is important in all our relationships that people are able to take us at our word.

Our word should be a bond. Giving our word – fulfilling a promise – shows good character, so remember: If you can’t do something, just say so.

But a promise is a promise.

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Taken from “TODAY IS….A Gift From God”, (C) 2013 Tony Casson

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May 13

Posted on May 13, 2020 by Tony Casson

TODAY IS…

the perfect day to think about “everything”.

“’What do you mean, what’s the matter?’ Micah replied. ‘You’ve taken away all the gods I have made, and my priest, and I have nothing left!’”  Judges 18:24 NLT

When the stock market crashed in 1929, there were numerous stories of people committing suicide, many by jumping out of the windows of tall buildings. Why did they do it? The reason given is the same in every instance: they killed themselves because they had lost “everything”.

Oh, really?

Everything?

When our lives are built around the wrong things, it is possible to feel that way. If money is what we live for, if money is what we “worship”, then it is understandable that a stock market crash that takes it all away could be mistakenly viewed as having taken ‘everything’ from us.

But those who live only for money, gold, jewelry, cars, houses and whatever other material possessions money can buy are living for the wrong reasons and are definitely worshiping at the wrong altar.

The simple fact of the matter is that as long as we worship only God; as long as we keep Him in our hearts; as long as we do all that we can to demonstrate our faith and our love, there is no way that anyone or any situation can take “everything”.

God can never be taken from us.

If we are unwise; if we are foolish; if we believe the wrong things, we can reject God, but He can never be taken from us.

Obviously, losing a job or a dramatic downturn in the stock market could create serious problems for us financially, but these are all only temporary problems of this world. Bad financial news is not worth a life. Our secure relationship with the Lord will see us through any difficult period in our life – financial or otherwise, and it is of the utmost importance that when life turns against us, we turn immediately to God.

When we have a good relationship with God, we have everything we really need, and it is nice to be able to live each day in confident assurance that no one can ever take “everything” away from us.

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Taken from “TODAY IS….A Gift From God”, (C) 2013 Tony Casson

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May 12

Posted on May 12, 2020 by Tony Casson

TODAY IS…

a fine day to go treasure hunting.

“I rejoice in Your word like one who discovers a great treasure.”  Psalm 119:162 NLT

If we were to be digging in our backyards and discovered a chest full of gold buried there, we would undoubtedly be overjoyed, celebrate, and tell everyone we know about our good fortune.

It is simply human nature to want to share the news of our good fortune with others.

The Holy Bible could be our “spiritual backyard” even though there is a huge difference between the Bible and the dirt that lies behind our houses. While one may contain buried treasure, the other definitely has treasure within and discovering it is a lot easier than digging holes in the dirt with a shovel.

Within the pages of the Bible is a wealth of the wisdom of God. Easily discovered within the words written there are precious gems in the form of instructions on how to live our lives in a manner that is pleasing to God. We don’t have to dig very long or very hard to uncover the sparkling radiance of the truth. Our hands don’t need to become soiled as we reveal the gleaming nuggets of joy, happiness, and love that are scattered everywhere we look.

The value of the treasures that are within the pages of this wonderful discovery is beyond calculation. Mere humans could never count high enough to determine the ultimate value of what we discover with a little digging.

Many treasure hunts turn out to be wild goose chases as men and women trace bits and pieces of history trying to locate valuable gold, jewelry, or other items lost or buried centuries ago.

Not so with the Bible.

Each and every individual who picks up this wonderful “treasure chest” is guaranteed to discover wealth beyond their wildest dreams inside. All that is required is an open heart instead of a sharp shovel. All we need is a little of our time each day instead of our sweat and our aching muscles.

And when we make discoveries, as we will each day, we should rejoice and share the wealth with those around us.

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Taken from “TODAY IS….A Gift From God”, (C) 2013 Tony Casson

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May 11

Posted on May 11, 2020 by Tony Casson

TODAY IS…

a good day to look at the clock.

“You have made my life no longer than the width of my hand. My entire lifetime is just a moment to You; at best, each of us is but a breath.”  Psalm 39:5 NLT

In the backs of our minds, we are all acutely aware that the clocks of our lives start ticking down from the moment we are born. At that moment, only God knows exactly how much time is on that clock. The best we can do is pray that we live long, “normal” lives. Beyond that, it is out of our hands.

When we are young, we feel like we are “immortal,” and we live like we are “indestructible.” Of course, a sense of mortality enters after we have been exposed to death, but even then, we consider a short life with an abrupt ending to be something that happens to other people, not to us.

We wind up spending a good many years chasing after the material pleasures, comforts, and rewards that can be found in this life. Yet far too few of us devote enough time preparing for an eternal life with God. Even as we proclaim our faith and let those around us know that we await our time to be with God, many of us spend all of our time focused on the here and now with very little attention paid to the hereafter.

Many of us know, or have known, people who have developed a terminal illness such as a cancer that has proven to be incurable. Those of us who have gone through the process have noticed the change in the sick person as they focus on what is next.

Their priorities change.

They want to spend more time with family and friends. They want to spend more time with God. Many of them are afraid because there are doubts that they have lived properly and in a manner that will guarantee them an eternity of peace and joy in the loving presence of God. But their focus is all on preparation. They see that the end, for them, is near and they realize that what comes after is far more important than the here and now.

Each one of us has been “terminally ill” since the day we were born. Time is short, even for those of us who will live what we think is a very long life.

None of us knows when our clock will run down, so it is important to know what is important and live each day in readiness for the tomorrow.

It may just turn out to be the first day of our eternity.

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Taken from “TODAY IS….A Gift From God”, (C) 2013 Tony Casson

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May 10

Posted on May 10, 2020 by Tony Casson

TODAY IS…

a terrific day for a walk.

“…for we walk by faith, not by sight…” 2 Corinthians 5:7 NASB

If we were to observe a blind individual walking with the aid of a service dog, we would see someone moving through life with no fear because he or she knows they can trust their highly trained animal in all circumstances. There is no hesitation in movement and they move fearlessly forward guided only by their trust in the dog. While they cannot see the dog, they can hold on tightly to the special handle, but if they were to let go, they would have 100% confidence that the dog would remain at their side and be there for them instantly.

So it is with God and faith.

We all know that we are required to have faith in God and walk consistently forward in that faith with no hesitation and no fear. It is true that this may seem a little more difficult than the challenge facing someone who is sightless. After all, they can feel the dog, they can call out to the dog and hear and sense a response, and the dog leaves no movement open to question. When it is not safe to proceed, the dog stops. When it is safe, the dog moves. When there is an obstacle, the dog will guide the person to a path that safely avoids the obstacle.

Sounds considerably more clear cut and definitive than walking by faith, doesn’t it?

But is it really that much different?

When a sightless individual first depends upon a dog for guidance on streets that once held danger, it is safe to assume that there is some initial trepidation. It is only natural to be a little timid at first. But as the relationship between the two grows, and they become familiar with one another, confidence builds.

And so it is as we walk by faith toward the future God has planned for us. As we walk, we know God is with us every step of the way. As we pray and read the Bible, our relationship gets stronger and we grow more confident and trusting. We learn that God will forewarn us of dangers if we only listen. We learn that God will guide us around obstacles that are in our path if we only trust in Him.

Walking by faith does not need to be scary at all. It just takes a little getting used to, and it just takes a little practice. But in time, we will find ourselves walking confidently through life knowing God guides our every step.

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Taken from “TODAY IS….A Gift From God”, (C) 2013 Tony Casson

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The Tears in Cancer

Posted on May 9, 2020 by Tony Casson

“I am weary with my sighing;
Every night I make my bed swim,
I dissolve my couch with my tears.” Psalm 6:6

No doubt there will be many times on this journey that my heart will simply not be capable of finding anything to laugh about or be positive about.

Sometimes I will just want to sit down and have a good cry, and while the tears that stream down my face likely will not come close to making my bed swim or dissolving my couch (my bed is a loft bed, so it would take some pretty high water to make it swim, and my landlord’s couch is old and sturdy and would be hard to dissolve) there will be times when the tears will come.

Indeed, there have been times.

When I think of my children and the ways my lifetime of addiction and self-absorption took away so much of me from them, and I am faced with the reality that I may not have the length of time that I wanted to love them, to know them, and to share their lives – I cry.

I have cried for my Daughter.

So much time was lost, particularly with my Daughter, and we all know we can never get time back into the bottle from which it escaped. So much time was wasted. So much laughter was never shared. So many Father-Daughter moments that are what help an old man smile in his waning years were never experienced, nor were they photographed to be gazed upon with old, loving, watery eyes.

I have cried for my Son.

In the six years I spent as a single parent to him, more time was spent cavorting in my own decadence than was shared with him doing all of the things a Father and a Son do together. We shared a true, loving closeness, for sure, but I could have been a much better example of what it means to be a father; what it means to be a man; what it means to grow and mature; what it means to be responsible.

I have cried for myself, too.

Enter, self-pity.

What? Surely you didn’t think that I was always laughing, always positive, and always upbeat did you? That is really almost impossible no matter how hard I may try. There are simply going to be occasions when I am going to find myself crying and saying, “This sucks!”

At this writing, I have completed the first 10 sessions of radiation and the first 3 sessions of chemotherapy. I have had no major side affects from the chemo, but I take a steroid before treatment to block any allergic reaction. While it gives me a useful energy boost for a couple of days after, it can also produce some downswings in mood. While the chemo can produce diarrhea (praise the Lord for spell-check, eh?), keeping me sitting on one pot, the steroids can relegate me to the pity-pot, and I don’t really care to spend much time on either one.

As to the radiation, since it is primarily focused on the lymph node in the center of my chest, it is impossible to avoid damage (albeit most likely temporary) and irritation to the esophagus (thank you again, Jesus!) and currently I am developing a raspy voice, a cough, and some discomfort swallowing. My morning cup of mud today (although it is not Mission Mud) feels like it has little chunks in it (and yes, I checked, and no, there are not.)

So where do I turn in my tears?

“A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” Proverbs 17:22

So when I think of my two beautiful children, I will refuse to focus on what I didn’t do right. I will focus instead on the things I did. I will find joy in those thoughts and I will let those thoughts rule the day.

“I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.” Phillipians 4:13

I can face this disease and the major changes and disruptions to my life (and the lives of those who love me and care about me) because He says I can.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.” Proverbs 3:5

I can trust in the Lord and in the blessings to be found in this curse, because even when I want to sit down and cry and say, “This sucks!” I know that I can count on Him to be there to wrap me in His love and help me take another step forward.

So. The tears?

They will come as surely as this beautiful day has dawned.

But God sacrificed His only begotten Son in order that I don’t have to wallow in them, make my bed swim, or dissolve my couch.

And how incredibly awesome is that?

May our truly great God bless you all and keep you and your families safe.

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